False Assumption About Marriage Imbedded
Defining the marriage issue as about “same-sex marriage” unwittingly accepts an underlying false premise that marriage is merely the public recognition of a committed relationship for the benefit of adults. Claims of discrimination due to restrictions on marriage would not even be a consideration unless marriage is already understood this way. One can never win an argument starting with a false assumption.
When defending against “same-sex marriage”, the tendency is to immediately launch into a defense of marriage that justifies discrimination based on complementarity, “responsible procreation”, the most desirable situation for child rearing, etc., instead of first clarifying the conflict in underlying assumptions. Marriage is so much more than merely the public recognition of a committed relationship for the benefit of adults (a private interest).
Marriage is a reality that unites a man and a woman with each other and any children born from their union. If it were merely the former, it would be difficult to defend restricting it to just a man and a woman. But that is not what marriage is.
Starting with the reality of marriage, Stand with Children advocates oppose redefining marriage to accommodate same-sex couples. This repositions the issue and moves it away from homosexuality to a more positive discussion about the public interest of each definition of marriage.
It is important to resist the temptation to dwell any further on the term “same-sex marriage”. Not only does it play into the hands of those trying to redefine marriage and family, it is a distraction from what Stand with Children advocates are for: promoting the reality of marriage; and standing with the common interest that every child has in the marriage of his or her mother and father.
It is best to work on breaking old habits and expunge the use of the term from your vocabulary. Clarify that you are not against “same-sex marriage”, but against redefining marriage to accommodate same-sex couples because of its consequences for children and society. While some stand with the private interests of those trying to redefine marriage, we stand with the common interest every child has in the marriage of his or her mother and father.
Part 1 -- Introduction
Part 2 -- Pastoral vs. Political
Part 3 -- Against “Same-sex Marriage” = Anti-Gay
Part 4 -- “Same-Sex Marriage” A Slogan Not a Legislative Proposal
Part 5 -- False Assumption About Marriage Imbedded
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